I’m on the quest to find peace.
Preschool = free ride.
Elementary School = parents pay for lunch. (unless you were that lucky kid who’s mommy packed you a lunch and snack) Otherwise, free ride.
Middle School = parents pay for lunch. (unless you were that lucky kid who’s mommy packed you a lunch and snack) Otherwise, free ride.
High School = parents pay for lunch, small fees (sports, class, etc) Otherwise, free ride.
College = $40,650 + personal expenses (per year until degree desired at Pacific Lutheran University)
Everything seems cool until you get passed high school. Can you say parents? Because I can’t… FML.
I love this song. Words have never been more spoken with such honesty <3
High school is over, go figure.
College in the fall? I’ve never felt more broke.
Cheers to the beginning of the end.
I feel like I am on a never ending rollercoaster of uncontrollable emotions. I wish I could unlatch myself and jump off to safety, but how safe would that really be? Right now, I’m ascending up the steepest part of the ride. Butterflies in my stomach, palms getting sweaty from anxiety as I clench the hand bars, close my eyes, all in preparation for the fall. And then I realize…
I’m tired of preparing myself to fall.
I use to think I was so sure of where my heart belonged. But in reality, I’m starting to figure out that the feelings I thought I had weren’t nearly as deep as I anticipated. Part of me wants to just believe I can still love the same. But the other part of me, so incredibly persuaded and shattered by horrifying experience, wants me to be isolated, alone, disconnected.
I almost feel obligated to be this image thrusted upon me by my environment. I want to just throw in the towel, knowing that as soon as I get up I will be shot down. Sometimes to grow and to evolve in life, we have to give up. I’m ready too. Believe me when I say I’m more than eager to give up and throw it all away… But I’m not going to give that satisfaction to those whose every wish is to see me hit rock bottom.
Whomever I loved, liked, or even disliked, I’m emotionally detatching from you. But its accidental… I can’t help but be Hopelessly Undevoted to you…
xoxo vickysecrets xoxo
Where is my life heading next? Will I be happy? Will I be successful?
What does God have in store for me?
Whatever it is, I’m very excited to find out.